Why a family shower and not just a BABY shower?

Babies don't need showering! They will be totally oblivious to the gifts that have been given. Parents however, they do need showering: showering of wisdom, of guidance, of food, of useful gifts, of support, love & blessings.  We need to bring the attention to the two people who are stepping into their most important roles as mother and father. What better way to do this than to organize a special moment, a rite of passage, to share love & support?

As a doula, and mother of 3 children, here are my best recommendations for a
Family Blessing Shower:

*Have someone who "GETS THIS" facilitate/ host this event to create a supportive and loving space where the parent's wishes will be respected.

*Hold loving rituals/ activities that will create life long memories of this special day for the parents. Some examples could be:

• Weaving a flower crown for the mother from blossoms brought by each guest.
• Honoring the new parent with a foot bath & massage in a basin filled with warm water and infused with special dried flowers and salts.
• Creating prayer or blessing flags with which to adorn their home or birthing space.
• Creating a community quilt where each guest brings a special square a fabric to sew together into a family blanket.
• Creating a scrap book with special messages for the parents.
•  Stringing of beads from each guest into a necklace or chain for the parents to use as a point of focus during birth.
• ...the possibilities are endless!

 Gift Ideas for the WHOLE FAMILY:

• I may be partial to this one, but DOULA CARE is one of the best gifts one can give to new parents!! What new family wouldn't love some extra TLC either in pregnancy, for the birth or after baby's arrival?! A doula will provide loving, non-judgmental support for the new family. Cooking, light house cleaning, watching baby so the parents can shower or sleep, caring for older siblings, offering guidance in breastfeeding, baby care, infant sleep strategies, baby carrying, etc...
• A House Cleaner--who could say no to this one?!
• Freezer meals & snacks (just make sure to check with the parents for allergies/ intolerances and preferences beforehand.)
• Massage or Osteopath sessions--everyone needs body work after a birth!

Gift Ideas for Mother:

• Herbal Teas for pregnancy & postpartum: look for teas including herbs such as nettle, red raspberry, oat straw
• Nipple and/ or belly creams & oils
• Breastfeeding pillow--my favorites are the long, oval buckwheat filled ones!
• Washable breast pads
• Sitz bath mix (for her tender parts after birth)
• ​Books--my favs are, Ina May's Guide to Childbirth, The Mindful Mom-to-Be, The Natural Pregnancy Book, The First Forty Days and Yoga Mama Yoga Baby.)

Gift ideas for Father:

• Baby carrier--especially one that suits a Dad! Ergo baby carriers (like this one) & kangaroo wraps are my most recommended.
• Story books for Dad to read to baby.
• Books for Dad (ex: The Birth Partner by Penny Simkin.)
• Skin-to-skin shirt!

Things that Baby will need:

• Baby face clothes & towels
• Grow-with-me pants (they are oh-so-comfy for baby and last forever!)
• Onsies & PJ's that snap or zipper down the front (CAUTION: the-pull-over-the-head ones for the 1st month or 2 are just a disaster waiting to happen, especially when trying to take them off after a poop explosion!!)
• Muslin swaddle blankets
• Fridababy kit (clippers, thermometer, nose suckers, etc...)

Consider buying these items used or borrowing them from someone:

• Washable Diapers 
• Car seat
• Highchair
• Bouncy chair
• Co-Sleeper or bassinet 

As you can see, new parents need less than you think in terms of baby goods. More importantly, new families need SUPPORT (rather than material gifts) to get the best start to their new journey. Babies needs are simple: loving arms to keep them warm and to be fed. It is the parents that need care. Please consider this before buying all the "cutie baby stuff." Offer a gift from the WHOLE FAMILY section. They will thank you, I promise!